This Is Awkward!!

This is awkward

She walked past me with Ronaldinho's flair

Dazzled so much, I got as excited as Rick Flair

Maybe it would be fair to not stay clear of her and introduce myself as the next Tony Blair

At the end of the day who cares??  It wouldn't burn off my hair just to speak to her

Her hair bouncing as she came near,

My heart as soft as a wasted avocado pear

Now she stares at me…

This is awkward

Her look goes on and on and I start choking on my own air

I held unto my black tie which just like me was being blown away

Suddenly the witches of Achimota sneezed my swag away like a pile of clay

My tummy rumbled… Like play like play, this is last night's food doing a replay

With immense speed my bowels made motion to my southern gateway

Now in my head, I'm singing "Lay Away Lay Away"

But oh no Sway wasn't doing the verse this time,

Now… This is awkward

Closer she comes… A smile spreads across her face

I smiled back sheepishly as she quickened her pace

With a deep breathe I said to myself, "Peace be still, peace"

"Hi" she said with an angel's voice of grace as I tightened the bowels gates

The world seemed to move in circles as I hoped against embracing this disgrace

"I recall your face" she says…

I nod like a sick goose with an uncomfortable grin sheltering my southern business

Struggling against bowel hiccups she grabs my belt

"Give me my money", she screams!!

Now this is awkward!!

The unspoken chapter of not paying for her food opens like a birthday card

My face looking as disengaged as a sick retard

She shook me harder as she disregarded my "I will pay you tomorrow!!" plea

With too much bowel movement to flee, I stay put like a blood-sucking flea

Just then I realized church was no more in session

The New Year service festivities had just commenced with a procession  into the very streets I stood

As a guest pastor, being hooked by my belt in front of the congregation was never part of my new year resolution

Now this is awkward!

Feel free to leave a comment!! ;-)